Today I have an incredibly long work day. I started at 7, and will be at the office for my usual 8 hours. Then I’ll leave the office and drive to Condon for a public meeting tonight regarding a controversial timber sale that my agency is planning. We have a pre-meeting staff meeting at 5, then the public meeting starts at 7. It’ll probably run til 9, meaning I won’t get home til nearly 11!
Knowing that it’ll be a long day and I won’t get to do my usual afternoon workout, I tried to get up early to go swimming this morning. I had a fairly good swim yesterday afternoon where I worked on some technique drills, and I was planning to do a long endurance swim this morning to try to reinforce those habits and get the blood pumping early in the day. But just couldn’t make myself get out of bed. I hit the snooze bar for over an hour, trying to come up with any excuse not to exercise. Finally during one of my waking bouts I promised myself that I could take a long lunch break and go to the pool mid-day. So I’ll do that—go swim for a half hour or so at noon. But I’m bummed that I couldn’t coax myself to do it this morning. Yesterday I did manage to get myself up to go to yoga. But I was cranky during class, and just didn’t get in my normal chipper post-morning-workout mood.
Ah, the roller coaster of motivation. I guess it’s quite possible that I’m physically tired, that my body is asking for a little break after all of the tough workouts the last few weeks, and the extra stress of Saturday’s race. But I don’t feel nearly as physically tired as I feel mentally spent. I’m just kind of half-cranky, and I don’t. want. to. work. Not at my real job; not at the gym. Nope, I just want to lay on the couch, watch a movie, and spend my whole day eating and sleeping and being worthless.
Perhaps I just haven’t done enough relaxing lately. I sure didn’t take any breaks this past weekend. And I know I’m stressed with this big project for work, and I’m PMS-ing to boot. But taking a day off to lay around and wallow in my tiredness and stress isn’t an option. And my workouts aren’t giving me the good mood highs that they usually do.
Pout. I just want to be happy and motivated and full of energy all the time. Is that too much to ask?