Thursday, March 19, 2009

That's What Friends Are For

The following is an email conversation I had this morning with my good friend Sally*

(*actual names have been changed to protect the not-so-innocent!)

"i'm in a sad funk today. don't know if it's hormonal or build-up from all the relationship stress this week (not mine, other peoples'), and/or my knee is hurting and swollen from a run yesterday... whatever the cause, all i want to do today is go home and go back to bed. and cry. it wouldn't take much to get me to bawl today.

that's not what i need help on-- this funk will pass. but while i'm in it, i know i'm vulnerable, and there's a bagel store right across the street. and chocolate shouldn't be hard to come by, either. i could totally binge.

remind me that i don't want that stuff. i don't need it. my yogurt and granola will make me feel better than 3 bagels will."


"Sounds like all of the above and I can totally empathize - I had a super hormonal day last Thursday and this Tuesday a super emotional day where I did come home after work and cry super hard - but it was GREAT and cleansing - sometimes it is just really really good to cry and feel your emotions. We had a tea ceremony in my meditation class and we have been working on opening your heart - so I am spouting "feeling"

AND you are right, you will feel much worse if you binge on a bunch of stuff - take my burger episode last Thursday when I was hormonal - I felt full and heavy and not better at all. Maybe this afternoon you can treat yourself to a really nice piece of chocolate - not alot, but a fancy one - because it is also okay to be good to yourself and giving yourself a break and chocolate is a really nice treat in small doses (I am not doing a very good job here, am I). My point is, for me, I do better when I am not as strict and let myself have the small treats here and there. But, do not just eat a bunch of crap or crappy hershey's chocoloate - go spend a bunch of $$ on a really small piece if that is what you are going to do - and wait until much later to do it - because then if you really want it you will still want it. And NO BAGELS - they are stupid, empty crappy carbs and really not that great. LIKE MY BURGER Everyone has days like this and you should not be too strict with yourself. Sorry about your knee - what happened. Did you guys make spin this morning??"

"Thanks-- you're the best!

I'll keep the chocolate option open for the afternoon and see if I need it. Good suggestion on getting really good stuff (plus, I'd have to walk to Worden's to get it, so I'd burn some calories doing it, rather than waddling across the street to get a pack of M&M's).

We did go to spinning this morning, but I only span (is that a word?) for a minute or so, and decided not to do it. My knee was still swollen inside, and I didn't want to push it. I don't know what happened to it-- probably just over-use. Although I've been running 2-4 miles 2-3 times a week (so about 5-10 miles per week) throughout the winter, I didn't run much at all in mid-Feb/early March after my wisdom teeth and such. So I was only doing 5 or 6 miles a week for a month or so, and then jumped it up to 17 miles last week. Too much too fast, I think. Even though it felt good cardio-wise, that jump might have been a bit much for the joints. I started getting a pain in my knee last Wednesday on a run, but shrugged it off to getting-back-into-it pains. It didn't get any worse, but didn't go away for my next 3 runs. Then last night I did a big hill run, and it definitely started feeling worse and I got some internal swelling. So rather than push it right now, I'm going to rest a few days, then start back in slower-- do the beginner marathon plan, which has shorter mileages and smaller jumps in the amount of miles each week. And on the "optional" days, choose to cycle rather than run most of the time-- to keep my cardio and leg strength up without putting so many hard miles on. Hopefully that will help. It's tough not to get immediately discouraged when something's not right physically, but I need to be smart, take the rest, and remain hopeful that it'll get better.

So here I sit with an ice pack, and a couple jars of glucosamine and ibuprofen. Let's heal!"

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